What Women Say And What They Really Mean…

We need – I want

It’s your decision – The correct decision should be obvious by now

Do what you want – You’ll pay for this later

We need to talk – I need to complain

Sure… go ahead – I don’t want you to

I’m not upset – Of course I’m upset, you m*ron

You’re… so manly – You need a shave and you sweat a lot

You’re certainly attentive tonight – Is s*x all you ever think about?

I’m not emotional! And I’m not overreacting! – I’m on my period

Be romantic, turn out the lights – I have flabby thighs

Hang the picture there – No, I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise – I noticed you were almost asleep

Do you love me? – I’m going to ask for something expensive

How much do you love me? – I did something today you’re really not going to like

I’ll be ready in a minute – Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

Is my butt fat? – Tell me I’m beautiful

You have to learn to communicate – Just agree with me

Are you listening to me!? – [Too late, you're dead.]

Yes – No

No – No

Maybe – No

I’m sorry – You’ll be sorry

I’m not yelling! – Yes I am yelling because I think this is important

In answer to the question “What’s wrong?”

The same old thing – Nothing

Nothing – Everything

Everything – My PMS is acting up

Nothing, really – It’s just that you’re such an asshole

I don’t want to talk about it – Go away, I’m still building up evidence against you

Can’t we just be friends? – There is no way in hell I am going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine, again

I just need some space – … without you in it

Can you help me with my homework? – If I keep whining, the fool will do it for me

Do I look fat in this dress? – We haven’t had a fight in a while

No, pizza’s fine – Cheap bastard

I just do not want a boyfriend now – I just do not want (you as a) boyfriend

I don’t know, what do you want to do – I can’t believe that you have nothing planned

I don’t really mind where we eat – As long as it’s the place I’ve already decided on

I like you but… – I don’t like you

You never listen – You never listen

We’re moving too quickly – I am not going to sleep with you until I find out if this guy in Bio has a girlfriend

I’ll be ready in a minute – I’am ready, but I am going to make you wait because I know you will

Oh Yes! Right there – Well, near there; I just want to get this over with

I’m just going out with the girls – We are gonna get sloppy and make fun of you and your friends

There’s no one else – I am doing your brother

Size doesn’t count… – unless I want an orgasm