Thursday, April 2, 2009

Selecting your men

Important things to know about choosing the guys in your wedding party...
An airplane full of passengers needs more than just a pilot to make for a safe and pleasant flight to any destination. That pilot needs a co-pilot, and those pilots need a crew. A wedding is no different; you are finally the pilot and so it's your task to choose your co-pilot (best man) and crew (groomsmen) carefully if this trip to the altar is going to be a successful one. is here to help.
Two by Two: Groomsmen for the bridesmaids

Just as the groom is an "extra" when paired with his bride, the groom needs to find two to four men to act as "extras" to be paired with the maid of honor and bridesmaids. You'll need to tap one guy to act as your best man, and he'll be paired with your bride-to-be's maid of honor. The other men are paired with bridesmaids. You need to think long and hard about the candidates amongst your friends and family to find just the right gents to go with her ladies. Your wedding and your bride's memories aside, the matchmaking often leads to other weddings for you to attend down the road! As a groom, you'll want to put some effort into knowing who to pick, and who to leave in the seats.

The Best Man for the Job
This is the big one. It's also typically the easiest choice to make. Take a short trip down memory lane, and it becomes obvious. It could be the younger brother you used to beat up (and, though you would never admit to it, is a much better basketball player than you.) It could be your college roommate (and former wingman). It could be your best friend from high school. The choice is very personal, but probably obvious to you. You can only pick one best man.

That being said, you need to pick someone whom you can trust through and through, because this guy will have to do a whole lot more than just planning your bachelor party. In fact, the lead-up to the Big Day will present many tasks for this person.

The best man will:

* plan your bachelor party, but also keep you in line
* lead the groomsmen and make sure they arrive on time
* hold the wedding rings for the groom on the day of the ceremony
* make sure you get to the ceremony on time
* assist you through the wedding day jitters you are going to have (trust us, they're not just a myth)
* act as legal witness to your wedding
* make a wedding toast (at minimum) or speech (better yet)
* take care of the turbulence at 30,000 ft. (like your drunken Uncle Larry) so that you (and your bride) don't even notice

You and your "Best" will be in constant contact, and since he has some serious responsibilities, it might be helpful (though not critical) for you both to be in the same city.

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